Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
