Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Randomize
