So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
