I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
