Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
