their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
