It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
