so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize