Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
