New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
