North Korea, Best Korea!
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
If I die, sorry about rent.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize