Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
