weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
