I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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