but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Please, let me fuck your mom
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
