That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I'm just crazy horny about you
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
