non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
