I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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