So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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