He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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