U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
