This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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