we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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