Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
