I'm jealous of your bromance
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I have surprise drugs for everyone
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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