it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Are we still banned from the library?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
