Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
