sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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