I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize