Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
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