According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I just found puke in my bra..
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Boobs speak an international language.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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