He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
