are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
