Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize