Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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