did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
