He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm both gender and math confused
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
