I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
