Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Barsexuality is the new black.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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