yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
