also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
