Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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