Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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