As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
