We should be called the Road Head Warriors
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
