We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
