I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
