when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
