can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
