i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
The Olympian is in my bed
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
